Twin Flame or Soulmate?

As we approach Valentine’s Day, love is probably at the forefront of your mind! I work with hundreds of clients each year, and love is always a big theme in my work. Whether they want to manifest a romantic relationship, need guidance navigating the ups and downs in a current one, or want to find the most conscious way to transition out of one, my clients (and I) love talking about love.

Can you remember the last time you met someone very special? Maybe it was your current partner. As soon as the sparks started flying, you probably began to wonder: Is this the one? In the throes of new love, many people have an innate inclination to classify or categorize a relationship so they know whether or not to invest their time and energy. Not only that, we have a tendency to gauge the emotional safety of a relationship before we allow ourselves to be vulnerable. We want to establish a sense of trust before revealing our soft, squishy sides that we save for our most intimate partners.

In your effort to define relationships, you might have stumbled upon the terms “soulmate” and “twin flame.” What is the difference between the two? How can you know whether or not your person is a twin flame or soulmate? This is a hot topic in the spiritual world, and there are varied perspectives on the subject. In this article, I will share my understanding, which is based on what I’ve read, my own meditation on the subject, and my many years working with clients and relationships.

What is a Soulmate?

Before you are even born, your soul exists, and throughout your life, you encounter people who play important roles in shaping your life experience and destiny. Thinking back on your life, can you recall events that seemed fated or meant to be? These sorts of synchronistic happenings encourage us to believe that we are participating in the unfolding of a divine plan, one bigger than we can even imagine. We encounter certain people throughout our lives who contribute to our life experiences in such remarkable ways, we cannot imagine life without them.

If you have ever felt an instant connection with someone, as if you have known them your entire life, you have met a soul mate. A soulmate is a person in your life with whom you connect on a very deep level. Soulmate relationships are sacred contracts we enter into before we’re even born, and that is why we feel such a strong sense of familiarity with the person. These special people come into and out of our lives to teach us lessons, and the relationships help us spiritually grow and evolve.

Often, you feel an instant attraction for a soulmate, especially in romantic relationships, and that spark serves a purpose. The relationship has a sort of energy, and you can feel it on a visceral level. Sometimes, that person makes you feel right at home. Other times, you might feel an instant repulsion which, over time, shifts into feelings of friendship and love. Regardless of that initial impression, you have an intuitive knowing: This person will be important in your life. If you did not feel some electricity, you might never move into the relationship and thus never learn the valuable life lessons with which the other person is here to help.

Soulmates are not only romantic relationships. Your friends, family members, co-workers, teachers, or bosses could be soulmates. Soulmate relationships are not always easy. In fact, soulmates can push your buttons and challenge you because these tests and trials help us grow.

What is a Twin Flame?

Each of us has a twin flame or another person who embodies the polarity of yourself. It is if your soul were split in two, and each part lives a separate life. You might imagine you’d feel incomplete as if a part of you were missing. Many of us can feel that way, and then we look for completeness or wholeness outside of ourselves. We expect our friends or partners to complete us. The irony, however, is that you don’t actually meet your twin flame until you feel complete and whole within yourself, just as you are.

Twin flame relationships are powerful, intense, and creative. When two twin flames come together, they feel a deep spiritual purpose beyond the relationship. They feel called to work together to help others and be a representation of divine love here on earth. These couples can manifest a lot because the process of manifestation requires an equal balance of yang, or generating, giving energy, and yang, or receiving, receptive energy.

When you meet your twin flame, you know it without question. You can feel it, and while you can resist the connection or try to close your heart, you cannot deny feeling the intensity and sense of purpose. As spiritual relationships, they will only last if built upon a foundation of integrity, trust, willingness to grow, patience, kindness, generosity, and faithfulness. That said, twin flames are not exclusive to romantic relationships. They could be a sibling, friend, grandparent, or another type of relationship.

Many people never meet their twin flame because they still have work to do. They either have to heal past situations, amend karma with others, or they have to work their way out of unhealthy emotional patterns of need and dependence.

A twin flame might not even be here on earth. They may have crossed to the other side. You can still make a connection through prayer, meditation, or even through your dreams.

When you finally make the connection with your twin flame, you feel a surge of energy, as you witness a miracle happening in your life. At that point, anything is possible.

How can you meet your Twin Flame?

Set the intention to make a connection, and then focus on your spiritual growth. You can’t go searching for your twin flame, they come to you, often as a result of the most unlikely circumstances. When two souls are contracted to meet, they make it happen, and the process can feel like a miracle. All manner of barriers, obstacles, or limitations clears when the time is right. Trust that will happen to you once you set the intention.

You can expedite the process by experiencing wholeness within yourself, releasing fears of being alone or doubt about your worthiness of love. The moment when you realize you are enough just as you are, and you understand you do not need anyone else to complete you, you relieve your past relationship karma and move closer to meeting your twin flame. For help with this process, you might try therapy, deepening a prayer or meditation practice, journaling, attending love and relationship workshops, or seeking guidance from a spiritual counselor or healer.

Keep in mind, relationships of all types have ups and downs, challenges and strengths, even twin flame relationships. In fact, sometimes, those with whom we share a dynamic connection push us way beyond our comfort zones. Therefore, if you’re sure you’re in a relationship with your twin flame and you encounter a rough patch, hang in there! Accept that you’re in a period of growth, and collaborate with your partner to find solutions. Good, healthy relationships will challenge you, but they also provide a safe, secure space within which you can grow to be your best self.

The soul is complex beyond our understanding. We cannot know truly what it is nor understand its potential. So, we cannot verify or prove anything we know about twin flames or soulmates. Therefore, in relationships, go by what you feel, and trust your intuition. We can experience our biggest spiritual growth in relationships. If you feel drawn to someone you’re sure is your soulmate or twin flame, trust you feel that way for a reason, and go with it! At the very least, you will open your heart to experience love in a whole new way.

Rachel Lang is a professionally certified astrologer and healer who works with individuals, small businesses, and corporations. An internationally recognized speaker, she also hosts workshops and offers classes, retreats and meditation groups. Rachel loves helping people identify and heal challenges or roadblocks in life. She supports them in decision-making processes by mapping astrological trends and forecasts to offer a glimpse of what’s ahead. Her favorite part of her job is writing horoscopes and articles for LVBX Magazine. You can find out more or schedule a session online at



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